March 5th, 2002

introspection

more ramblings and an attempt to catch up

Interesting that the icon for "okay" in my current mood style is a face smiling slightly. Without looking at every single style, I think in most of the mood styles here "okay" tends to be an unhappy or neutral mood - whereas that one's definitely on the happy side. When I think of "okay" I think of it as mostly neutral but on the unhappy side - "well, *sigh*, I'm ok, I 'spose". That's how I meant it, anyway. Never mind.

Haven't written anything about what I've been up to for ages. Thinking about it, I've just realised why. I had a huge financial crisis erupt on February 14th, which completely screwed up anything I might have wanted to do about Valentine's day. And partly as a result of this I disappeared from the net for a couple of weeks. And then when I did come back I was feeling really awful. Apparently quite a few people were worried about me after my more depressive posts of the last few days. Sorry about that :( Obviously I should write some more about how depression affects me, but I don't really want to write about feeling down when I'm "okay"! I'll do that some other time.

Well, the financial crisis is now under control. Still haven't done anything about Valentine's day. Lots of people wrote about it in their journals, but I liked A Valentine for those who have never received one best. For a number of years I've seen it as an excuse to tell my friends that I appreciate them rather than as a romantic, lovey-dovey occasion, so I usually send out at least emailed cards. This year I managed the grand total of one (and that to meeping & Peter, who I would hope don't need a card to tell them I love them). I still haven't actually exchanged cards with Richard yet!

Since then I've been working a lot, and spending the small amount of free time I do have trying to catch up with people. At some point when I was feeling truly rotten, I thought "didn't I used to have friends?". Saw mjl on Tuesday 19th when he came round to help me deal with the bank. Saw hatter and bfo for dinner on Saturday the, er, 23rd? which was the first time we'd seen them since New Year's Eve. On Thursday 28th I saw Eddy (who has a livejournal but likes to keep it private), for the first time since the middle of December, and today I saw Duncan and Rob, for the first time since my birthday party! Last night I sent emails to a few people I've been neglecting for a while. Now I just have to make sure that I don't lose contact again.

It was odd talking to Duncan and Rob - they're old friends from college. We used to do a lot of union stuff and a lot of roleplaying/mudding together, neither of which I do at all anymore. Left me feeling nostalgic. Might write more about that later...

Talking of roleplaying, I finally did the Which D&D Character Are You? test that everyone else has done, and apparently I'm a Chaotic Good Elf Ranger Druid. If you want to know more about it, click the lj-cut thingy. Collapse )
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