November 30th, 2004


actually a lot less depressed than this sounds

Stuff. Things. Things. Stuff.

For a few months now over a year I have had significantly less energy for keeping in contact with people than I used to have. As I am one of the only people I know who is extroverted in the gaining energy from being around people meaning of the word, this means that a huge number of my more casual relationships have just dropped off the radar - because if I don't have the energy to keep in contact with them, that means I don't hear from them. There are people I care about who I haven't "spoken" to in over a year. I read their journals (sometimes) and that's it.

I'm catching up with lj after another longish period of not reading it and completely in passing I've just discovered several unpleasant things that happened to people I care about too long ago for sympathy expressed now to be any use. (Did any of that grammar make sense?). There are >100 journals on my friends list, most of which I never read and most of whom don't read me - but I don't want to drop people off my list if I trust them to read my personal posts (which is the criteria I use for adding people & why I'm constantly annoyed at lj's lumping together "trusted people" and "watched journals" - there are journals I watch of people I don't know and can't trust).

I suppose this is another of my periodic pleas for people to get in touch. Actually phone me up or email or text and let's make concrete plans to do something. Because otherwise you'll just go on with your life and I'll just go on with my life, being lonely from lack of people but without enough energy to break barriers of "oh, we haven't actually talked in 2 years, what the devil is going on with your life?" sort of thing. There are too many names in my address book of people I never talk to, too many names on my lj friends list of people I no longer know.

I don't even know why I'm whining here, because only about 10 people actually read my journal, anyway.

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