helen-louise (baratron) wrote,

  • Mood:

Birthdays and daze.

Yesterday I was supposed to say happy birthday to stellarwind, who was "levelling up". Except I didn't get online all day. So here is an apology along with an actual post in my journal, to make it extra apologetic. (Normally I only post happy birthday in people's own journals, or on forums, or by email.)

In other news I am a little ball of fuzz and stress. Still very, very tired which is now coupled with not sleeping properly. Since Friday night I've been having what I can only term "very loud" dreams, so I wake up having dreamt so much that I don't feel rested. Ugh. They have not been entirely bad dreams, but some of the ones that weren't nightmares were so odd that I've felt disturbed by them nonetheless. Also, why do I keep having nightmares about cake?

I am completely disorganised with regard to Christmas (which, in turn, means that the "me + Richard" entity is completely disorganised, because it's my job to do holidays). Apart from the presents that I've bought through the year as I've seen something that would be perfect for someone, I have absolutely nothing. While college was happening I was too busy, and now it's so dark all the time... Christmas shopping & organisation does not combine well with SAD. Whose stupid idea was it to put Christmas in the middle of winter? Those Southern Hemisphere types have it the right way round. At least in the summer I'd have enough energy to deal with it. But then my birthday would be in midwinter instead, meaning it would be dark and cold and I wouldn't enjoy it. Bah. And yes, I suppose I could spend half the year in the Northern and half in the Southern Hemispheres (including at least a month in Iceland when it DOESN'T GET DARK), so I'd never have to deal with winter, but I don't have enough money to maintain multiple homes. Nor do I fancy moving to the Equator, which is the only actual "cure" for SAD - unless someone is planning on moving a civilised place like London, New York or Seattle to the Equator.

I have about 30 hours of coursework to do over the holiday (if I get it all done right first time - otherwise it'll take longer). Half of this is from one lecturer, the rest is from another four lecturers combined. I think lecturer #1 needs to learn what levels of work are appropriate. If everyone else is giving us one problem sheet, I don't see why she gets to give us three huge lab writeups (which she wants bound into a folder!) AND another two problem sheets. I am actually worried about getting it all done, because of aforementioned darkness and lack of energy. It's discrimination to make me do work at the time of year when my brain doesn't function - isn't it?
Tags: christmas, college, moaning, sad, sleep disorders

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