I'm better now and was going to send them out as New Year cards instead. I wouldn't have to change anything because they're American and thus extremely non-specific about which particular holiday they're for, but - in some sort of wonderfully modern irony - my printer is refusing to print because it's decided it needs a new yellow ink cartridge. Even though there was nothing wrong with the yellow ink cartridge the last time I finished using it, and even though the labels are in black ink only. Having to write twenty or so addresses by hand is just beyond my ability to cope.
So I've sent cards to the handful of relatives who would complain if they didn't get one, and I am just going to have to apologise to the rest of you. It really isn't that I don't care about you, it's that I was too upset about a friend who I hadn't been in contact with enough lately, and then too ill to cope. I'm going to keep the cards and send them out next year.
My plans for New Year's Eve are glorious. I am going to London to buy cake and then I am going to sit at home playing Elder Scrolls Online. Nice and warm, and no need to be around drunk people on the train. One of these years I'll try to get an invite to a party where I can stay overnight, or host people here instead, but one of these years I won't be ill and exhausted.